HAVE YOUR SAY: Do single moms really need another obstacle?

I am not special, I am not unique, I am like every other woman out there; I make mistakes. Some mistakes are small, some forgivable, but others life changing.

I am not special, I am not unique, I am like every other woman out there; I make mistakes. Some mistakes are small, some forgivable, but others life changing. When I got pregnant with my son, I knew it would be life changing, especially when me and the father didn’t stay together. After a year of maternity, the security of a job to go back to is something that gives comfort to any mother or family. When that job wasn’t there or rather changed so dramatically, it prompted me to try and get some help. The matter is not resolved and so I have proceeded to try and find another full-time position in the Comox Valley. I have a few years of college: Counselling and psychology and before that, accounting and bookkeeping. I have worked in offices since I was 19 and I feel at home being the filter, the glue and the first person one would see when walking into an office. I have always loved working. In the past few months, 40 of my resumés have been sent out and I have had eight interviews. My last interview sent me to Powell River for the entire day with another gal who was up for the same position; talk about awkward. I have done my best to not talk about my personal life in an interview; knowing full well the thoughts and assumptions it would create. Single mom: possibly unreliable. Sick kid, no daycare, doctor appointments, dentist appointments, meetings with the teacher, etc. The list could go on. But what no perspective employer knows or even asks: I have great friends; I even have daycare for pete sake. Even though I have lived in the Valley for only a few years I have such a wonderful community of friends. My son has great godparents, grandparents, and aunties. I have other lovely mom friends; all who are so willing to lend me a helping hand. It takes a community to raise a child, right? In my case, yes it does. When I responded to an e-mail after an interview in the conservative format of, “We are sorry but the position has been filled,” I responded with some questions and a prompting as to why I didn’t get the position. They stated that I interviewed well, had a lovely personality, great previous experience, confident and capable. But it was my personal situation that they could see may be an issue. With long hours required, and work needing to be brought home at times, a woman in my position may feel stretched. My position? I guess they mean single mom position. I really feel like I am hitting my head against a brick wall here. Is this really the reality for single moms? Is it really this difficult in 2011 for a single educated mother to retain a suitable home or a job for her and her family — alone? I am far from being a feminist, however, I am all for equality for the sexes. What frustrates me most is the men out there who are not caring for their children full time have every opportunity in the world to find a job and never would a prospective employer ever fault them for being a parent. Does anyone out there even know what a mother manages to accomplish in a day; having a job is like a much needed break. One which it seems I cannot get.A huge bouquet of red roses to Michelle at Cloverdale Paints.  When she heard that the Comox Valley Transition Society needed to repaint a large room used for everything from support groups to a weekly lunch for homeless women, Michelle not only donated the paint, but she also donated her time to paint the room! Thank you, Michelle, for your generosity and community-mindedness! The room is beautiful!The Grade 4s and 5s from Mrs. Harry’s, Mrs. May’s, and Ms. Segriff’s classes accompanied Ms. Slater on a gratitude tour on Oct. 7. They walked from Arden Elementary School to Ruth Masters Park, the YANA office, Hot Chocolates, the Fire Department and the Food Bank. At each stop, the students were able to personally thank the business owners or volunteers and hand them handcrafted cards. Ruth Masters was treated to a rehearsed song, and she returned the favour by playing a song for the students on her harmonica. The students put much time and energy into this tour and although they were tired from a very long walk, they were thankful to be able to meet these community-minded individuals and show them how much they appreciate them.Not sure about you but I wouldn’t like living my life tied to an outdoor clothesline. Shame to the brown rancher on Royston Road, outskirting Cumberland. Your poor black dog lives outside 24 hours a day, huddled in a ball, trying to shelter itself under the eaves from the recent rainstorms and cool nights. Day, night, rain and wind there the black dog waits, desperate for attention as it barks and whimpers whenever anyone walks/rides by. No doghouse, bed or shelter to be seen. This is disgusting how it is treated. There are miles of trails in Cumberland — let your dog run, socialize with other dogs and bring it inside once and a while to keep warm. Better yet find it another home because you should not be allowed to own an animal.  SPCA has been called, however the dog has been living like this for months — frost and snow coming soon. Get it together!It is now Thanksgiving weekend 2011 and I am still listening to the noisy motorcycles! I don’t believe enough is being done. I asked a police officer one day when a noisy bike went by us at Simms Millennium Park and she said she wasn’t with the traffic segment of the local RCMP. Give me a break.

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